Meet Marshall Deppity, Jr., our local Sheriff, THE LAW of Cogarville, sort of. 'Course, seein' as how he growed up around these parts, most folks around here used to call him Marshall, which he didn't mind much, seein' as how everybody in these parts claims to have raised him.
Naturally, he wasn't always a Sheriff. He kinda started out in diapers, and worked his way up.
His Daddy, Marshall Deppity Sr., was the Sheriff before him, and as it came about, we began to wonder if maybe his daddy was needing diapers (owing to an incident involving an actual armed robber). It just seemed that Marshall would naturally be the right one to fill his Daddy's shoes, so to speak.
Of course, he was a Deputy, at first, and fairly proud of his proper title: Deputy Sheriff Marshall Deppity. We wasn't sure what to call him. Couldn't rightly call him Marshall, on account of he was only a Deputy Sheriff, and his granddaddy, the Marshall, took exception. Couldn't call him Sheriff, on account of that was his daddy. So folks pretty much just called him Deppity, which lessened the confusion, but not entirely. He was never sure whether they was mad at him, and callin' him by his last name, or being respectful and calling him by his title. It's all in how you say it, and it was often said both ways.
Well, as it turned out, his daddy wasn't gonna need them diapers as soon as we thought (turned out there was a skunk in the barn, and no further investigation was done). The Deputy got tired of being called Deppity either way, so he went off and became a Deputy Marshall, working for his granddaddy, Marshall Marshall. Well, actually, Marshall Marshall Marshall. His younger cousin, Sherriff Marshall, took his place as Deputy to his daddy.
Deputy Marshall Marshall Deppity got to be a mouthful, but we couldn't rightly call him Deppity any more, on acount of his cousin Sherriff Marshall was the Deppity, and we couldn't call the Deppity Sherrif "Sherriff", 'cause The Sherriff would go for his gun, and we'd find another skunk in the barn. Couldn't really call either of them Marshall, 'cause that was their Granddaddy, widely rumored to be equally quick in the draws. Sheriff Deppity wasn't willing to be called by his last name, so of course we had to call him "Sheriff ". There for a while, we had to resort to calling Deppity Marshall Marshall Deppity "Junior" which he really hated, for other reasons, entirely.
When Granddaddy Marshall Marshall, the Marshall retired, Sheriff Marshall Deppity naturally assumed that he would get to take his place. Then came the unfortunate incidence of the skunk in the barn. So being the next best qualified person for the job, and the only one willing to take it, Deputy Marshall Marshall Deppitty became just Marshall Marshall Deppity. Well, he just didn't care much for the rigors of the job, so he did the right thing, and after the election, he traded places with his daddy, who we now call Marshall Deppity, We ain't allowed to call him Marshall Marshall, 'Cause if you say it too loud, former Marshall Marshall still packs a load.
But back to our Sherriff. His cousin stayed on as the Deppity, so if you call the Sheriff "Sherriff", Deputy Sheriff Sherriff Marshall says "Huh?", and if you call him Marshall, His daddy and grandaddy both say "what?". So we usually just call him Deppity, which he still hates, since he's the Sheriff and not a Deputy..........Well, he is a Deppity but not a Deputy..........and we call his cousin, Deputy Sheriff Sherriff Marshall "Sherriff" on account of, though he is Marshall he ain't a Deppity Marshall. Well, he is Deppity Marshall, but.........................